Weird Beauty Trends
Do you ever see something labeled as a beauty “trend” and go, Huh? Well, you will after reading this article. Women do a lot of weird things in the name of beauty, but sometimes we take it a little too far. There’s a difference between being edgy and innovative and being, well…bizarre. These WTF beauty “trends” are going to leave you scratching your head, and thanking your lucky stars that your own beauty routine is so simple and even a bit boring. You’d much rather have a boring routine than test out one of these weird “beauty” tricks.
Take a look at this odd dental beauty choice. Most people get cosmetic dental surgery to fix a crooked smile. However, this Japanese beauty trend called Yaeba, accomplishes the exact opposite. Yaeba translates to “double tooth,” and Japanese girls pay anywhere between $160 and $422 per tooth to create a crooked grin.
Tattooed Freckles
Natural freckles are cute and endearing, but getting them permanently tattooed on your face? Yeah, that’s going to be a no for me. Not only does it not look very natural, you run the risk of having a change of heart after the procedure, and being stuck with them permanently. If you want some temporary freckles, you can get a freckle pencil. We all love us some cute freckles, but this may be a step too far.
Penis Eyeliner
This is just the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen. It looks like these girls fell asleep drunk at a frat house and woke up with dicks drawn on their faces. The trend was started by then 19-year-old Asia Brautigam from California. The look then went viral, with other girls sharing their dick-spangled eyes on social media. It’s a totally impractical trend, but I guess it takes a real set of balls to pull it off. Just don’t wear this trend to Thanksgiving at your grandmother’s house.
Glitter Roots
Behold glitter roots. This looks like a unicorn ejaculated all over the top of your head, or like you’ve got radioactive dandruff. You think getting sand in your after the beach is annoying? Try getting this glitter bomb out of your hair. Plus it looks like it would get on everything in your house and all over your clothes.
Armpit Hair Dye
Okay, I’m all for ladies going au naturel with their body hair. If I’m single, I do so myself in the winter months. But is it really necessary to dye it? Your armpit is a pretty sensitive part of your body, so I can’t imagine dousing it in permanent hair dye would be good for your skin. Also, dyeing it with the warmer hues makes it looks like you’ve got a horrendous case of scabies under your arms.
Fake Braces
Most teenagers dread getting braces as much as they dread passing a wet fart in the middle of class. But among some Southeast Asian countries, braces are all the rage. If you’re unlucky enough to have perfectly straight teeth, you can purchase fake ones. Some young Asian girls consider having braces a status symbol and purchase fake ones as a fashion statement. Not only is this pretty silly, these fake braces have been linked to two deaths in Thailand. Some of the wiring in these fake braces contain lead, which can cause poisoning. It’s also pretty easy to choke on the components.
Dimple Surgery
I’ve heard of people getting plastic surgery to remove the dimples from their backsides, but I’ve never heard of plastic surgery to get dimples put on your face. Yes, this is an actual thing and it’s called dimpleplasty. It’s been around for about 30 years but has gained popularity recently because of celebrities like Miranda Kerr and Kate Middleton. In fact, natural dimples are considered a birth defect.
Bra Insert Makeup Sponge
This beauty “hack” uses a silicone bra insert as a makeup sponge. This one isn’t so out there, but it seems like a waste of a perfectly good bra. The good thing about this sponge though is that it doesn’t absorb makeup, so your foundation lasts longer.
Vagisil Face Primer
Okay, I don’t know how I feel about putting something meant for an itchy vagina on my face. But the more I read the explanation, it makes sense, though, this doesn’t mean I would try it. Huda Kattan, who is a beauty guru with 15.4 million followers, posted a video about primer replacements. Her favorite was Vagisil. Vagisil and makeup primers share a key ingredient: dimethicone. This ingredient helps keep your foundation in place.
“I guess it kind of makes sense … cause it soothes skin,” Kattan said about the Vagisil.
Yeah, I guess it makes sense. I’m going to pass though.
Brownie Scented Eyebrows
Did you ever dream about having your eyebrows smell like the inside of a bakery? Look no further; the answer to your prayers is finally here. Too Faced Cosmetics have introduced a new “Brow-nie” pencil that smells like real brownies. This is a pretty impractical gimmick. I get scented/flavored lipsticks, because you can actually taste them. But who the f**k is going to be tasting your eyebrows?
[Editor’s note: We don’t judge here at Sarcasm Society, so if you want to taste someone’s eyebrows, go ahead. You do you.]
Shaving Gel Makeup Remover
Okay, guys put shaving gel on their face all the time. But Maria Yeager, a beauty blogger suggested using shaving gel as a makeup remover. It’s a bit odd. Also, if you get that stuff in your eyes, it’s going to sting like a mother***er. Others suggested using coconut oil as an alternative.
Polish Mountain
When you see the phrase “polish mountain,” you might be thinking of some beautiful green peaks in Poland, like the Rysy or Kasprowy Weirch summits. But, you are so, so wrong. That’s polish, as in nail polish, mountain. It looks like a complete mess. It looks like a sick bird had explosive diarrhea all over the tips of your fingers.
It started off as a video posted by nail artist, Cristine, where she painted her nails with 116 coats of nail polish. The highest anyone has gone up to was about 280 coats. This means you must have a lot of time on your hands (literally), to accomplish such a task.
Lollipop Lips
Mac Cosmetics came up with this beauty trend which they dubbed “lollipop lips.” It’s basically smeared lipstick on the outside of the lips, which is supposed to resemble a mouth that just sucked on a lollipop. However, what it really accomplishes is a look like the girl just sucked on something much more phallic. Social media has reacted strongly against the look, with some people saying it looks more like a rash than anything else.
